Cruise Port Security – Fuzzy Handcuffs

We have added a few Daily Programs from the MSC Lirica from a March 2008 Caribbean Cruise. Check on the Dailies link above.

Why worry about passengers bringing guns? According to one anonymous person who works at a certain cruise port that isn’t in Albany, NY, one of the most confiscated items is the fuzzy handcuff. Naive me, I thought that it was perhaps for those criminals with skin conditions or some kind of disability, like a malformed wrist that regular handcuffs would hurt. Oh, my mother never told me about the fuzzy handcuff. It really has little use in law enforcement. At least, the anonymous person explained what it was and we were not the only person who didn’t know what a fuzzy handcuff is. Well.

So according to Anonymous, many sheriff’s deputies, who do work at the terminal during embarkation, take this contraband and hang it from the mirrors in their cars. Pay close attention the next time that you see a sheriff’s vehicle.
I guess that I was thinking of another bondage item, as I think cruise passengers should be aware that there isn’t a headboard in the cabins to tie anything to. Obviously, I don’t really know my S&M equipment. Now I think that there might be a real market for what I thought fuzzy handcuffs were: some fuzzy fabric with velcro. Yes, it would have to be strong velcro, but no ship will confiscate a velcro item. You could just call it a wrist brace. Maybe a brace for carpal tunnel. How’s that?

Recently I saw a comment on a cruise board about somebody who had purchased an adult item in the shop onboard. Was I spending too much time looking at the chocolate or perfume? Is there a back room that has such items? Or is chocolate an adult item? Perhaps the cruise lines need to think about a different type of store.

I admit that I did a search for fuzzy handcuffs online. I see that they come in a variety of colors. I found a link to a U-Tube video about when to wear black handcuffs. I suspect that would be on formal night, right? The video disappointed me as it was some silly person who giggled throughout the video. I still don’t know which color suits which occasion. Maybe next time.

While waiting in the line to board the Monarch of the Seas, we heard somebody next to us talk about the person who came off the ship wearing handcuffs. She didn’t say whether they were fuzzy handcuffs or ugly unadorned police-issue handcuffs.

Do the fuzzy handcuffs have keys? What if you lose the key? What do you do or say when your handcuffs are found in your luggage and you are pulled aside to explain?

Next time: Going to jail.

Sail Away

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